To survive this game
Don’t question Coach’s honor
It’s gonna cost you
Well, that may not be entirely true, but I have to acknowledge and pay tribute to Benjamin “Coach” Wade’s series of haikus in this week’s episode of Survivor 50. The self-proclaimed “Dragon Slayer” is perhaps the show’s most pretentious and biggest blowhard ever, but that’s why I love him. Every nickname he bestows, every tall tale he tells, every proverb he butchers makes for television gold.
After last week’s overblown “blood moon” triple elimination, the show is back on track with a great installment this week, filled with the balance of conflict, humor, and strategy found in the best Survivor episodes.
Mistakes Were Made
Though she’s generally regarded as a strong strategist, Aubry Bracco has made her share of sloppy mistakes in her Survivor career. In her first appearance in 2016’s Kaoh Rong, she was so indecisive in one particular round that she literally crossed out her original vote and switched it at the last second. In last week’s episode, she didn’t live up to her promise to flush out her hidden immunity idol, claiming that, in the heat of the moment, she simply forgot. Nobody bought it, and her foolish tactic backfired.
Meanwhile, Survivor 45 champion Dee Valladares had it out for Jonathan Young, who voted out Kamilla Karthigesu last week after being left out of the previous episode’s Charlie Davis blindside. Valladares is known as one of the show’s strongest and most lethal champions, but Young got the better of her in the battle, exposing her hypocrisy and lies in front of everyone.
Stephenie Shoulders the Burden
In the premiere episode of 2010’s Heroes vs. Villains, Stephenie LaGrossa Kendrick dislocated her shoulder in a brutal opening challenge, and 16 years later, that injury crept back into the show. Selected to take part in a journey that put her vote at risk, her challenge was to keep her arm raised for an hour to earn an advantage. That old Survivor injury meant she had to do the challenge with her non-dominant arm.
Kendrick is best remembered for her first stint in 2005’s Survivor: Palau, where she became the first—and only—contestant to be on a tribe by herself thanks to her Ulong tribe’s unprecedented losing streak. She became a fan favorite as one of the toughest women to ever compete on the show, but would she be able to prove herself two decades later? The answer was a decisive yes, as she outlasted the clock and earned a steal-a-vote advantage.
Is it a Comeback if Coach Never Left?
After Ozzy Lusth won his eighth immunity challenge in his Survivor career—one shy of the record held by “Boston Rob” Mariano—there appeared to be a consensus that Valladares would be the target. “Dee is causing me to play this game like the Dragon Slayer of old, emerging from the shadows, ready to vanquish the dragon, who is now Dee,” said Wade, who wanted to split the vote in case of an idol play. This irritated a few people enough to throw his name out as the target. The threat was baseless, however, as Valladares was voted out and became the first member of the jury.
In Survivor 45, Valladares was in control throughout the entire game: savvy, charming, and manipulative in all the right ways. Seeing her play from the bottom in Survivor 50 was fresh and actually boosted her stock as a gamer. Everything that seemed effortless for her in Survivor 45 showed up this time as a tenacious, gritty, and bold competitor who played hard to the bitter end.
Survivor 50 Snubs
I’ll conclude each week’s column by spotlighting one man and one woman who were left off Survivor 50 but would have made for excellent inclusions.
It’s ridiculous that 2007’s Survivor: China champion Todd Herzog never returned to play again, especially considering the show held an all-winners installment in 2020. The sassy, perky gay Mormon flight attendant played a strong game throughout the season, but is particularly renowned for his unapologetic performance at the final Tribal Council, in which he bragged about outplaying his competitors. It’s especially impressive considering that Herzog was just 22 at the time.
Likewise, it’s a shame that we never saw a return appearance from Cydney Gillon, who played along with Bracco in Kaoh Rong. The bodybuilder was the one bright spot on that season’s “Brawns” tribe, which otherwise consisted of bullies and cannon fodder. She’s turned down invitations to play again in the past because the Survivor conditions impacted her career, but was apparently willing to play in Survivor 50.
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